Grandma has gone through hell, only to come out on top with a sick and twisted sense of humor and arrogance that only an old lady can get away with. Beyond that, she has a passionate sense of American patriotism that would make any red blooded American smile with tears of joy.
Grandma’s dealt with a lot of shit; an abusive husband, abusive bosses as a factory laborer and a maid, and the typical abuse of hustling to feed, clothe, and educate five kids by herself in New York city after immigrating here, LEGALLY, from Colombia.
She’s always been the family favorite, and we always had a good relationship, but we didn’t become really close until I was 28.
In September of 2012 I came home from Afghanistan broken and in need of surgery. When I came out of surgery Grandma was taking care of me, and not even two months later she got sick and almost died. So I moved in to her house to take care of her. Together, we got rid of Grandpa, got her health better, and developed a funny and loving friendship that very few people have ever had with their Grandma.
Every day Grandma gives me lessons on life, love, sex, (STD’s mostly), money, (frugality mostly), politics, racial stereotypes, news, patriotism, American history, and anything else that comes to mind.
I give her lessons in modern dating, racial and religious tolerance, Taliban hunting, cougar hunting, and electronic music.
Grandma’s twisted, dark, and hilarious views on life are based on; 62 years with a abusive husband, 30 years in Colombia, 20 years hustling to feed 5 kids in Queens, New York, and the Telemundo TV show, Casa Cerrado.
Lots of people can relate to having a funny and inappropriate Grandma, but this little immigrant gem takes the cake.
The book, “My Roomie and Me” is scheduled for release in early 2017.
Look out for the website, www.myroomieandme.com, coming soon!